How many times have you found yourself re-hashing a work situation with a friend/family member? You talk about what you said, what the other person said- you basically reenact the whole situation trying to figure out what the other person may have possibly been thinking, probably.
Your friend-who has never met the person that you are talking about and likely has no idea about the dynamics of your workplace- is then expected to provide a realistic solution or strategy to guide you through the scenario that you have just described.
Why do we do this? Is it because our friend/family member is a genius? Is it because our friend/family member has mind reading powers and can tell you what important people in your life think of you? Or is it more likely because we just want (maybe need) someone to verify the work world according to us?
Work takes up a lot of our lives. In the words of my mother, “Work is interfering with my personal life!” So true. So how do we remedy this feeling? We take the power back! We tell anyone who is willing to listen what is happening in our work life according to us. Sometimes our work stories even morph into soap operas complete with an evil villain (your boss who doesn’t let you off early on sunny days) and backstabbing, betrayals (coworkers taking credit for your work). But what comes after the story? I mean this is a story that you have created.
If we spend our time changing coworkers into characters and situations into mini-dramas, we begin to see the soap opera at work unfolding in real time. When that happens, we are no longer able to view a situation without bias because we are buying into the plot that we have created.
If you are trying to move on from a situation or work through it, say your piece and let it go.
Remember: a soap opera never ends- it just goes on and on.
by Kristen Keyes